Looking on the Bright Side

Initial reaction to sink piled high with dishes:

"Damnit! I was gone all day making cookies for your scrawny butts and nobody thought to load the dishwasher?!? NO ONE?!?"

Bright Side:

It's always a treat to watch your 8 year old drink milk from the only clean cup: a shot glass with the words "Pimp Juice" scrawled across its side.

Initial reaction to waking up at 5 am with somebody's feet in my face and someone else's face at my feet:

"Good LORD! Can't I ever get any rest? I can't even move a centimeter without one of them instantly rolling into that warm spot! FINE. I'll just get up at 5 FREAKING AM!"

Bright Side:

"Holy shit that is one beautiful, winter sunrise. The entire sky is purple and pink! Think I'll get my Flip out and sing the sunrise song while watching the sun come up. But only for about 10 seconds because it is colder than a penguin's butt out there!"

Initial reaction to sending my 5 year old off for 3 days of watersliding fun with her Daddy:

":( I wanna go, toooo!!! I'm going to miss my sidekick so much that I won't know what to do with myself!"

Bright Side:

Corinne told me that she will probably tell Daddy about 50 times how much she loves him and how happy she is to spend time together, just the two of them. She said she can't wait to get him all to herself and hold his hand and go to the candy store and ride the water roller coaster and scream and laugh and kiss him and, and, and... How can I feel sad when they're going to have such a fabulous time? Plus, I get to take the boys to see Harry Potter at a matinee tomorrow!! Homeschooling's flexibility opens up all sorts of possibilities, doesn't it?


*Y'all do know that I have a giveaway for cool girly headbands, right? Because there are hardly ANY entries and I know for a fact that I have more readers with little girls!! Do me proud and check it out, peeps.

What are YOU Thankful for?

I'm thankful for good friends who take my boys on overnighters that last until 2 the next day.

I'm thankful for a best friend (whom I just happen to be married to) who likes to surprise "his girls" with spur-of-the-moment gourmet dinners.

I'm thankful for a daughter who likes to help her Mommy bake apple pies.
I'm thankful for the health of everyone I love.

I'm thankful for my own health which enables me to celebrate with said loved ones.I'm thankful for brown eyed little girls who watch The Velveteen Rabbit while slicing apples and chatting with her mother about the slushy snow that is falling outside the kitchen window.

I'm thankful for 2 handsome sons who fling their arms around me with smiles after being away all night.
I'm thankful for the simple pleasure that a picture like this can evoke within me. It's memories like these that I want to hold onto the most.

I'm thankful for everyone who ever touches my heart and feels as though I've touched theirs.

It's true that "Life is not measured by the number of breaths we take, but by the moments that take our breath away." May you all be breathless this Thanksgiving weekend.

Travel safely. Hug someone you rarely hug. Tell the ones you care just how much they mean to you...

Scary Dreams

Driving in the van on the way home from watching The Wizard of Oz in Chicago on Sunday, I decided to gently probe Evan's brain about his nightmare issues. Evan's always had a highly active sleeping brain and it's gotten progressively worse for him as far as nighttime fears go. I understand all too well about vivid dreams and night fears. There isn't a night that goes by without an entire novel in my brain. But Evan's fears have gotten to the point that he isn't able to fall asleep in his room without us and is ALWAYS in our room come morning. Our bed, it's getting crowded.

So I began with little questions about what he's afraid will happen if he sleeps alone. What exactly does he dream about? Is there something we can do to avoid such scary pictures? Is it all the video games and scary movies? What is encouraging these nightmares?!?

When I found out what it is that scares him the most, I was a bit taken aback. It's not the monsters or war games that makes him afraid of the dark. It's not man-eating dinosaurs or robots from space that has him crying to sleep in our room. What scares my son the most is the thought that someone will separate him from me and Patrick. His words, not mine.

What do I do with that? Monsters, I can handle. But how do I help him deal with something that actually CAN happen?

He's afraid that something bad will happen and he'll be all alone. He's worried that tornadoes or car accidents or sicknesses will kill us off. His 8 year old brain has reached that stage where he understands that life isn't certain or guaranteed and that ALL people die. Though I thought I had tried my hardest to be up-front and relaxed about death and uncertainties about tomorrow and embracing today's blessings, he is still suffering the same agony that I suffered at his age; That all children MUST suffer in order to truly comprehend mortality.

It still sucks. Especially when your son is now bawling in the back seat on I-55 and you can't pull over. Especially when he's hiding his little head in his hands and begging to just go home instead of getting a milkshake from McDonald's. When he passes on milkshakes, you know it's serious.

I need to remember that each child of mine handles things differently. If I want to have a conversation like that with JUSTIN, I do it in the van to eliminate the extra distractions that a house provides. But Evan NEEDS the distractions to keep his mind from over-focusing on the scariness of what we're discussing. Evan needs physical contact that can't be given while you're driving at 60 mph.

3 bits that are too long for tweets and too short for posts and aren't really funny enough to stand on their own. Really, just look away. Look AWAYYY!

Guess what? I woke up to a freezing thunder storm! Isn't that awesome?!?

Seriously, people. This means that I was able to just put on a fuzzy sweatshirt over my Oh-So-Fashionable pajamas (yoga pants and an old t-shirt) and I was DRESSED FOR THE DAY! I love days like today. We'll do school work and then I'll clean a bit (a lot) and we can have hot cocoa and steamy soup. Nobody has to "Do" anything pressing. The kids are all sleeping in after a loooong weekend and I am tip-toeing around downstairs in an effort to encourage their slumber till at least 9:00. After Corinne's night terrors IN MY BED last night where she was sobbing hysterically "And I don't know whyyyyy!! I'm just so saaaaddddd!!" while standing up on our mattress, we can all use a little bit of quiet rest.

Sounds like a perfect Monday to me!

~~

If you haven't checked out my review of the Chicago Toy and Game Fair, I've mentioned some of my favorite games and toys that will be under our tree this year. But if you're still looking for something and don't see anything that appeals, let me know because I have IDEAS abound right now!!

~~

Words to this mother's ears:

Last night, after helping me edit a little blackmail video of his father swinging a light saber around his head with John Williams playing in the background*, Evan turned to me and said,"When I grow up, I wanna be a BLOGGER!"

Let's all pause to wipe that tear from our cheeks now, shall we? Not a fireman. Not a doctor. Not a businessman like Daddy. Not a "dog" like when he was 4. Nay. My child sees blogging as a CAREER.

You validate me, oh son!!

"Why do you want to be a blogger?"

"You get to do cool things and get free stuff!"

"Well, it's not 'free' altogether. I have to spend time writing about the things we do and products I receive. You know that. But, you could start blogging right now. You could tell me your own reviews of stuff and I could type them out. We could be a Mother/Son team!"

He pursed his lips in consideration. Suddenly blogging was sounding a bit more like "real work".

"I'll get back to you on that, Mommy."

Nice.


*True Story. It is an awesome new collectible light saber that lights up and makes the zzzrrr zzzrrr noises when we swing it. (wait, "we"? Heh. Heh. I meant THEM. It's not like I was swinging the saber around in full-Jedi fashion...) Patrick saw me recording his imaginary battle and said something along the lines of "I'll kill you if you put this on the internet... blah blah blah...." Whatever. He knows it's all fair game around here.

Tonight... Tonight... La da dee dee.. tonight....*

Getting all dolled up to hang out with my son at the TAGIE awards in Chicago tonight! A precursor to the Chicago Toy and Game Fair, it will be honoring toy and game inventors of all ages. I am personally giddy to meet John Ratzenberger from Toy Story 1,2, & 3 (not to mention every single Pixar movie. I always listen for his voice in each movie. Does that make me weird?). I hope that this weekend re-inspires Justin to utilize his creative juices and bring to fruition some of the cool games that he and his buddy have concocted over the years. Trust me; there've been some cool ideas in this house...

If you're going to the CHITAG on Saturday, let me know and I'll keep my eyes open!

* Does anyone know the full lines to that song? Can't quite place the words and I have to Jet** to get everyone situated before we can leave. I mean, containing this kid's hair is NO easy task...
** HAHAHAHAHA!!! Get it?!? HeeHEE!***


*** Please tell me I'm not the only one getting these references. Please?

Feeling Horizontal...

Need Help.

Head Cold + sideways computer screen + insomnia = Bitchy blogger with a neck ache and a tendency to yell at anyone who chants "Mommy? Mommy? Mommy? Hey, Mommy?"



How do I fix my computer screen?!?! This is seriously ridiculous and highly annoying. I can't read anything longer than a paragraph and I can NOT figure out how to fix it. How did it happen? Well, according to Evan and Corinne, they were only playing on Nick Jr. and it just "happened." Heh. Naturally.

Help.

Me.

Turkey Guts

Dude. No post since Sunday and nobody cares? Nice, guys. Reaaaaalll nice. I could be lying on the floor, bleeding and crying and unable to type and nobody would ever even notice. Just a whisper of a tweet on the internet of "Whatever happened to... what was her name again? Oh well..." and I would fade into obscurity... My heart; it breaks.

Despite the fractures within my life-giving organ, I am persevering. The smallish turkey my dad gave us is filling the house with delicious aromas as it roasts within my oven. The turkey and veggie soup that is simmering away, concocted from the neck and guts that I delicately yanked from its body cavities is just as eagerly anticipated for today's lunch.* I adore autumn's aromas...

I had a fabulous post all written up in my brain for Veteran's Day. Sadly, it will have to wait because we were installing and then adjusting to the newness of internet/phone/tv via Comcast's Xfinity. Now we're all up and running and everything is fast and bright and shiny and new and I am going to need a few weeks to adjust my 20th century brain to this new-fangled 21st century stuff. I will say I was highly disappointed with one thing from Xfinity. After installation, I was left with a pile of wires and cords from our previous services. My old cords aren't nearly as engaging or humorous as the commercial's:



Yeah, my old cords are less like an endearing but slightly senile great-uncle and more along the lines of a neglected 14 year old cat: They're evil and silent and like to shit and puke all over the place when you're not looking.

Not that I'd know anything about cats like that."I am not amused. Just wait till she lets go of me; I have in-depth plans of revenge that include your leather coat and a plastic bag that won't quite digest in my stomach..."

*Yummy. Nothing says "eat me" more than a neck removed from the butt of a turkey.

There's a lollipop stick on my floor..

"Look at all of the channels on the list, ma'am. Are there any missing that you might like to have?"

Our new cable guy was walking us through the incredibly impressive list of channels we would be receiving yesterday. I browsed quickly and decided it was fine. Really, as long as there's Nick, Disney, ABC, NBC, and CBS, I'm golden. And the money we'll be saving each month makes me happy enough to not notice if we don't get a few channels anymore.

"Did you notice they have HGTV, ma'am?"

(why does he keep calling me MA'AM???)

"That's... Home and Garden, right? Ummm. Yeah, I see it."

"Do you watch it?"

I stared him in the eye. My brows lifted and my arms slowly spread across the expanse of my living room floor. Encompassing the coats on the couch, shoes piled by the closet, puppets and Memory game pieces peeking out from under dozens of children's books, and a plate of half-eaten jalepeno poppers, I asked:

"What do you think?"

Having "it all."

Haaaaaahaaaahaaaa!!!

Is there a prize? Do we win something for over-structuring our lives and believing that there are certain qualifications we "have to" meet in order to be living a "good life?"

Newsflash: There are no prizes! There is only the moment you are in with the hope that you will have more moments to reflect upon the moments that have passed. That's it, folks. We don't receive commendations from God for having put our kids into all the "right" classes and achieving straight A's or going to a "great college." We can only live and breathe and hope that our presence upon this world has left a loving mark upon our family and friends.

Striving to succeed in the work force or to elevate our kids to have a "better" life than we did is all well and good if it doesn't detract from the peace within your heart. If you cannot breathe in and out and know that you were able to appreciate your life and its blessings then what is the point?

Who are you racing against?

Who are you trying to beat?

For everyone, no matter how many letters of accomplishment they can attach to their names or how many dollars they can claim on their income tax forms, will die. Death equalizes us all; the criminals and the saints. The elderly and the young. You cannot "anti-age". You cannot finish everything for there will ALWAYS be more to do. And if there wasn't time to finish all the minutiae that you deem "important" because you were enjoying an extra cup of coffee, reading a great book, or kissing your loved one? SO BE IT. Enjoy yourself! Being happy isn't something you can "achieve." It's something that is always available, right in front of you; you just have to acknowledge its existence!

No matter the negatives my own life may contain, I KNOW that I am lucky and I KNOW that things will continue on this up and down roller coaster until I can no longer breathe in and out. All I can do is to enjoy the dizzying thrills as best as I can. And it's always more fun to ride with my hands in the air and eyes wide open, don't you agree?

The Next Generation

The family is rarely in the car all at the same time and it's really unusual that we're in a vehicle with music (see also: stolen radio/job loss we're still recovering from/does anyone want me to review a car radio?). So, when we DO ride in Patrick's car, it's interesting to see the different tastes of music. The kids want some sort of dance/house/rap style that I like at, well, CLUBS and weddings, but not while driving on the road. I like a little bit of everything with a tendency towards pop/alternative/60's rock. And Patrick's all over the music field. It's crazy, actually. Ask the man who Justin's first grade teacher was and he'll draw a blank. Ask him the name of the guitarist in some random band from 1972 and he'll whip it out along with a funny or amazing bit of trivia as a side dish.

Priorities.

Anyway, we're driving along and Led Zeppelin comes on. Remember, this is music that is well before either of our times, but we still like it. I can remember "discovering" the Doors, Zeppelin and other records in my dad's dusty collection and playing those records over and over on my trusty cassette/record STEREO. I was so rockin. I honestly knew that no one in the history of forever ever truly understood the innuendos and metaphors that Jim was drawing with his words. I even sketched picture after picture of Jim and bemoaned his inability to stay away from the drugs and alcohol! Sigh...

AS I WAS SAYING BEFORE, we're driving and Zeppelin is wailing away. Pat cranks up the volume and we are seriously banging our heads and rockin that Grand Prix OUT. Extremely Awesome and not at ALL embarrassing.

All the while our children are wailing as though they are IN PAIN.

Pain?

Pain.

From OUR MUSIC. Which is waaaaayyyy cooler than the music that MY parents forced ME to listen to! I mean, we were subjected to the 50's and early 60's songs oozing with saccharine love songs because it's her party and her boyfriend was kissing somebody and DAMNIT she's gonna cry if she damn well feels like it (actually, I kind of like that song). We are WAY COOLER than our parents were.

Way.

WAY.

Shit.

It's all repeating, isn't it? We are they and they are we and we are all together and I have become my Mother.*


*Love you Mom! You're totally cool. And if I have to turn into somebody, I am extremely lucky that it's you. Muwah.**

** That is TOTALLY not a brown-nose because Christmas is coming. Where do you get those ideas?

Too long for Tweets.

I had a post to write but Corinne just walked in and started scratching my back. Oh my God, is there any blessing greater than a kid who loves you enough to scratch your back???

What a sweetheart. She totally gets everything in my will. Which, as of today, consists of 6 pairs of holey jeans, a dirty coffee pot and a whole lotta debt.

You're welcome, babydoll!

~~~

We're going to the circus tonight! I am so excited! We love the thrills and music and performers... I don't particularly love the cost of the food so we're going to fill up with a picnic dinner in the van and hope that the kids aren't too sad that we can't spring for the $10 cotton candies and popcorn. I won't even START on how ridiculous those prices are, because you already know...

You can still save money on tickets for Ringling Brothers in Chicago. It's a Fall tradition in Chicago that their circus comes to town. I can remember watching the same circus in the same building when I was a child. It's kind of neat to give my kids the same experience...

~~~

My kids are calling their Halloween candy their "precious." I am serious.

"Mommy, can I have some precious? But I just loooove my precious! Preeeecccciooouuussss!!!" called out with an echo-ey voice and clawed hands shaking in the air.

It's creepy and weird.

I am so proud.

Gewurztraminer *

8:37 pm Central

It's been a looooooong time since I've had too much wine and blogged. My apologies.

Thankfully, due to a big ole bottle from my mother in law (HI!) that will soon be remedied.

This is some good shit, G. Muchas gracias.

Justin just asked for candy.

At 8:30 at night.

I said yes.

We all like Mommy after wine...

Issa is encouraging me to entertain everyone on Twitter. Methinks that is a dangerous direction to go in. On? In? Which direction?

Eh?

sip sip

This damn spacebar is still busted. If I were to type without fixing every other word, it would look like this:

Four score and seven tyears ago our forefathers broughtforth unto thsi constinent a newnation.Conceived in liberty and dedicated to a propositionof some sort that all men are created equal butnotwomen until we fightreally hard and getwhatwedeserve in equal rights.

:)

* My wine. Yummy. Alllll goooonnneee... Sadness. Angry eyes.