About 3 years ago, my best friend called me. I could scarcely hear her whisper, but finally I understood that she wanted my husband to do her a favor. Her daughter, G, was 4 years old and going through a sassy phase. Talking back to her mom, hands on her hips, etc. She basically thought she was 14 instead of 4!
Patrick agreed to do this dirty, rotten favor to aid my friend in this parenting crisis...
Ring, ring...
Best Friend: Hello, is this Santa?
Patrick: (in a deep voice) Yes, yes it is! What can I do for you?
BF: Santa, I am having problems with my daughter, G. She is normally a sweet little girl, but has been being very, verrrrry naughty. I don't know what to do! (Pat could hear G crying in the background..)
Pat/Santa: Let me talk to G, please.
G: (wavery, tiny voice crackling with tears) Hello? Santa?
Pat/Santa: (deeper, boomier voice) G, I hear you've been being a naughty girl. Is that right?
G: (probably thinking OH MY GOD it's really HIM!) Yes....
Pat/Santa: G, I know you can be a good little girl. I will be watching you very carefully this month. You need to behave and not talk back to your Mommy anymore, do you understand me?
G: (tears are flowing) I'm SORRY SANTA!!! I'm so sorry!! I promise I'll be good!!
Pat/Santa: (trying not to laugh or cry, I'm not sure) That's my girl. You do your best, and I'll leave you a nice present on Christmas.
All this conversation, I am sitting on the couch with a pillow over my face, trying to cover the evidence of my hysterical laughter. Patrick was shooting me the dirtiest looks for not being more supportive as he was trying hard not to laugh. Poor guy.
He felt AWFUL, but it worked! It totally worked and G was much better behaved that month. Of course, she went back to her sweet and sassy self come January, but my BF was very thankful.
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11 comments:
You could make money off that service. The Santa Method of child correction. You need to get that marketed.
Oh my...I can just picture it! That is hilarious!
Genius!
So tell me, does he have the white fluffy beard all year, or is that just a seasonal accessory?
Brilliant! I agree with the first poster, Patrick could really make a killing doing it for a job! I'd pay for one of those phone calls just to get a month or 2 of excellent behaviour!! LOL :-D
that is hilarious...I will have to remember this one!
That rocks! We have a direct line to Rudolph over here, and he does lots of dirty work for Santa:)
How sweet of your husband to do that! When I was about 4, my mom had my uncle dress up as Santa Claus and come into my bedroom on Christmas Eve while I was asleep (okay, this sounds creepy, but I swear, it isn't!) so she could take a picture of him next to me to show me that Santa had arrived while I slept. It was really neat to see, and I believed in Santa for a really long time after that.
Okay,my cell number is....
I'm actually following Santa on Twitter and he's very convincing. When the one who can read starts acting up, I pull up the Twitter so he can see Santa on there and threaten to Twit him about his bad behavior. I can't imagine what a phone call would do! Classic.
I am totally remembering that when my girl starts acting up in a few years.
That's too funny! Seriously, I"m going to remember this in case I need to use it. I agree with the others who said that he could make some money doing that.
Too funny!
My mom pulled the same stunt on my sister once when she was acting up, except that my mom called a perfect stranger and amazingly enough, the guy on the other end of the line played along.
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