Tracey - Evan, I'm sorry I was yelling so much tonight.
Evan - (chipmunk imitation voice) Ok, Mama.
T - It is very hard for me to NOT yell, though. Sometimes, when you are naughty, over and over and over? And you're talking back to me, and sticking out your tongue, and being very rude it makes me feel like a pot of water on the stove. I get hotter and hotter and madder and madder until I just boil over! Do you understand?
E - (still chipmunkish) Ok, Mama.
T - (trying not to get annoyed at his silliness and lack of attention) Well, how do you feel when I yell at you?
E - Bad...
T - Bad, yes... But bad how?
E - I feel like a banana.
T - What?? A... banana?
E - I feel like a banana. All hard on the outside and squishy on the inside.
T - (dying and crying inside) Oh, baby... I'm sorry. I understand. How about we both work on this? I'll work on trying to keep from boiling over and you work on not disobeying me. Ok?
E - (STILL chipmunkish) Ok, Mama...
So, for any of you who were feeling like you were not the best Mom in the world, you can at least rest assured that someone else was making their child feel awful inside... just like a squishy banana.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
HEY! I need more VALID comments on my circus ticket giveaway!! As of now, the chances are really, reallllly good!
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15 comments:
Were Evan and Jacob separated at birth (and will you claim them both??). My throat hurt last night from yelling so much at both Jacob and Bridget. But Jacob is almost always the one to instigate and push buttons. It doesn't help that my husband is traveling and Bridget has (cross fingers) given up the B-O-O-B, making her a BIG BEAR in the late afternoon and early evening. When I went downstairs to wake up Hannah this morning, she had moved the chalkboard in front of her door. It said, "I hope you have a better day today, mommy." GAWD - I *hate* myself so much when I lose my cool and act irrational. But you're right - you feel like a pot of water that boils over. Why don't kids understand when you say to them, "I'm feeling angry and frustrated. Please help me out and cooperate." So yeah - I had a few bananas around here yesterday.
Ok mama! lol
(sorry)
great post. maybe that will help some of the newer moms feel less like they are the only ones who feel like a big banana sqwisher sometimes. I'm still going through that and mine are older. Good luck. I'm not sure when it actually ends! lol
p.s. TWO posts? Niiiiice!
OMG that is the cutest thing I've ever heard.
Well, I think it is definitely better to be hard on the outside, soft on the inside, than soft on the outside and hard on the inside. Right?
When you figure out the no-yelling thing, let me know, okay??
I'm trying so hard not to yell at my kids... but it doesn't always happen. It's such a fine line to walk. Obviously, the kids need to understand the rules and boundaries. There has to be some discipline in my homse and sometimes, they need to know that I mean business! On the other hand, I've watched my kids cower. Not from being hit physically, but from the verbal smack down. Sigh... we all do our best!
You are such a good mommy. You waited until a quiet moment and you talked about it. You asked him how he felt, you really listened, you admitted your own failings and made a promise to do better. And, so did he . . . the lesson you taught him is absolutely priceless. I only hope I can be half as good as you . . .
I hope that you both have a better day today. I have been yelling way to much lately also. I am going to really work on it. When ever I feel myself start getting mad I am going to say banana.
My daughter isn't really old enough for me to yell at, although sometimes I do. But more in a "oh my god, get away from the stairs/stove/trash/cat/toilet/litter box/cords" kind of way. Then I feel like the banana.
Oh, thanks to you (and Evan) for sharing about the banana. I think he probably described it really well. I really try not to yell, but like you say ... sometimes it's like you're a pot of boiling water ...
Oh Honey, lighten up a little, we've all been there. kids are more resilient then we give them credit for, I mean yeah you will do well to work on it, but totally don't think you are scarring him for life or anything!
oh, and I can't comment on the circus thing, I would love it, but Chicago? Umm, no.
You know I'm going to use that in reverse, don't you? The next time my son is disobeying and being mean, I'm going to tell him he makes me feel like a squishy banana. He'll totally get that.
don't you just hate that feeling of yelling mom? I so do.
I really like my chances of winning the tickets :)
Oh no, not a squishy banana! It's so interesting to hear what goes on in a child's mind.
Yeah, but he told you how he was feeling, because you took the time to talk to him about it and that is just plain Awesome parenting with a capital A!!!
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