My initial reaction to this picture that Corinne drew when asked what she dreamed of was standard with today's typical parent which is that I mini-freaked out! MY 5 year old daughter is having dreams about Justin Bieber? Where have I gone wrong? I've failed my little girl and allowed her to become overly sexualized in PRE-SCHOOL!!
And then? I took a breath, a huge chill pill and a little trip down memory lane...
Enter Mr. Jones.
Long before I saw Marcia obsessing about him, I managed to concoct dozens of personal fantasies equal to that of a Harlequin romance novel (minus the actual intercourse comparisons of flowers being opened...). From my top bunk bed in my pink and white bedroom, Davy whisked me away on romantic excursions to exotic white sand beaches. Oh! How we laughed and raced, hand-in-hand, all in slow motion! I vividly recall spinning in romantic circles with my love as he cradled me in his "manly" arms...
It struck me that I was about 6 or 7 when I first fell in love with Davy Jones. Close to the same age as my own little girl who imagines herself on stage with a sweet and attractive young man...
Were WE overly sexualized? I'll bet our grandparents thought so. In truth? Or at least, in my opinion of the truth?
I don't think so.
Every generation frets about the one that follows it. Rightfully so! After all, the changes that happen from one age to the next are so vastly different that we, as their parents, feel uncomfortable and out of our element. Anyone remember the Elvis situation? With all of that hip shakin and grinding, parents were in an uproar. Rock and ROLL?!? Their kids would surely be led down a dark and dangerous path of lust and drugs!
How about the Roaring 20's? Women cutting their hair? Wearing revealing clothing? Sleeping with men they weren't married to?!?
Dare I even guess at how horrified the older generation was when the young women of the early 1900's fought for equal pay and (gasp) the right to VOTE???
My point, as it is, is that human beings (especially FEMALE human beings) have been surprising and concerning their parents since the dawn of time. Constantly held down by men, we struggled to rise up and assert ourselves. Our daughters of today are the direct result of the battles fought by millions of women before them. The freedom to be ultra-feminine or completely butch is theirs to seize. The ability to choose a career in construction, Fortune 500's, or as a SAHM is theirs without question.
And so, my daughter's choice to daydream about a nice young man with a cute smile is ok by me. I won't be putting any posters of him on her ceiling anytime soon, but having a crush is one of the sweetest and most innocent loves a girl can experience. I have no desire to destroy this experience for her.
Shoot. Now I'm singing "Daydream Believer"... Try getting THAT song out of your head...
I am also known as Justanothermom on Twitter and write on my blog, Just Another Mommy Blog. I homeschool 3 kids in the suburbs outside of Chicago and am a Co-Producer of Listen To Your Mother in Chicago.