Don't be putting any apples on your head around me...

Yawning over my morning coffee, I blearily puttered around on my emails. I had to be speedy-quick, though because Corinne had ballet at 9 am and I loathe being even 5 minutes late for a 45 minute class. I mean, do the math! That's like, um... well... A lot of pennies and dimes. And I don't actually feel like doing the math. And you can't make me. ANYWAY! The scene is being set and I am getting distracted. As I was saying, hot coffee. Bleary emails. On a schedule.

Moving on!

I remembered that Corinne and Patrick have their Daddy-Daughter dance on Friday and checked my receipt from the park district to be certain of the start time. All was good and I noted it on my calendar, feeling quite proud of my efficient ability to plan and record things from one piece of paper to another. Good job, Tracey! You rock. But before I could finish patting myself on the back, I read the dates on Justin's archery class (his birthday present from us). And then? I practically shat myself.

APPARENTLY, I signed him up for the February class, even though I remember wanting the MARCH class. APPARENTLY, I never noticed that the 03/16 that I thought I saw on the paper actually read 02/16.

Fa.Bu.Lous. This is a 4 week class and 2 of the classes were ALREADY HELD.

Well, it just so happens that I signed up at the center where Corinne has her ballet classes, so I tucked the receipt and some luck into my back pocket and prayed that I could convince someone to break all the rules that are CLEARLY stamped upon all paperwork and websites: No Returns, No Refunds, No Way, No How. (Well, that's the impression I get, at least...)

Scene: 8:55 am. Holding area for mommies of miniature ballerinas. Community rec center. 5 or 6 pre-schoolers hopping around the puddles of melting snow and mud. Tracey approaches the desk with a crumpled piece of paper. And so it begins...

"Hey! Remember me? How are you? Yeah... I have a bit of a problem. Do you remember when I signed up for the archery class? And the Daddy-Daughter dance?"

Nice Receptionist Lady "Oh, sure. What's up?"

"Wellllll.... I am not sure how I missed this, but we are in the wrong class and I was SO upset this morning when I realized it! My son (pointing at scraggly 11-year old, scowling in the corner) is really excited about this archery class, and I was really careful to write all the dates on my calendar after we signed up and it was only this morning that I noticed that the 03 I saw on the paper is actually an "02" (waving paper in her face) and this means that we have MISSED half of the class! I mean, when I realized the dates were wrong I thought 'You're so stupid!' and I just about cried!"

NRL "Um..."

"Oh no! Not YOU. Not 'YOU'RE so stupid.' I meant 'I'M so stupid.' God. Now I really DO sound stupid..."

NRL "Um..."

"ANYway! I know all of the papers say that there aren't any changes allowed after the class starts but it was an honest mistake and we truly can't afford to sign him up for a class again and this was his birthday present! He's so upset (points at dull-faced pre-teen again) and it just breaks my heart to think..."

NRL "AHEM!"

"Sorry?"

NRL "Let me look at it, ok?" She generously shut me the hell up. Her eyebrows raised for permission, she snatched my printed receipt from my wildly gesticulating hand.

NRL "Hmmm... Let me see what I can do. Why don't you sit down over there (far away from me, you psycho) and I'll let you know if we can transfer him to the March class, ok?"

"Oh! Yeah. Sure. Thank you. Thank you SO much! Let me know if you need me. I'll be right over here, ok?" (pointing to the obvious chair next to the obviously unhappy 11-year old, I nervously backed away to position myself, ready to help her help me in any way possible).

Honestly folks? I was an honest-to-God, first-class NERD. I was blathering on and on, and the poor woman didn't get a chance to get a word in. As I fidgeted and bit my nails (I mean, $50 bucks, dude. That is a huge chunk of change for us. It was a real DECISION to be made before we paid for this class) she worked some sort of magic and got Justin switched to the March class (that I already have written on my calendar). All is right with the world.