Monday, August 20, 2007

If I could put time in a bottle...

Ok, that last post's title was from "Into the Woods." I loved that musical. It was the show of my freshman year in high school, but I was so freakin shy that my audition was for crap and I didn't get a part in it. I loosened up that winter and scored parts in the rest of the shows, but I soooo wish I had been able to be IN that show. Rather than just helping with sets and what not. ANYWAY, it's a really great play. And that song is sung by the witch to Rapunzel, asking her why she'd want to run off with the prince, where there is danger and hurt, when she could stay at home with Mama witch, safe and secure. Bored to tears and lonely, yes, but not being hurt by wolves and bad men. It's a common mother's wish, I'm sure. And then we realize that by taking away the wolves and dangers, we are also taking away the excitement of the world. The thrills, joys, and bliss of love...

It's a tough line to walk, this motherhood line. What is enough freedom? What is too much? Am I holding you too close, or do you need to be squeezed a little longer?

Trying to freeze time is impossible, yet we all attempt it at one time or another. Right now, with Backyardigans in the background and my boys BOTH watching it attentively, with the baby asleep and the rain falling... with my coffee getting cooler by the minute and me wondering what to cook for dinner.... This day will seem so far away someday. Someday, it will seem like eons ago. Someday, I will forget exactly why it was that I felt so stressed at times...

I cannot imagine being able to keep my house clean, with no fingerprints on the tv and cracker crumbs in the carpet. I don't want to, honestly.

On an aside, what is WITH me and song titles for posts, lately? Seriously. I need to stop.
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