Stream of Thought Thursday

Hey there.

How's things?

The days have flown by just as they have dragged. This "Polar Vortex" thing has certainly lived up to its name and caused some serious issues with my own space-time continuim. I've been wrapped up in the frigid cold with all 3 in the house (which also = "no school work" for the younger two. Have you ever tried teaching 2 kids while everyone else in the region is off of school? Yeah...no). I've literally been WRAPPED.UP. In blankets of both ordinary and electric varieties, extra socks and constantly reheated cups of coffee. I've been wrapped up in the details of finding the money for not one but TWO vehicles to get heaters repaired. And to top it all off, the emotional turmoil of reading the heartfelt words from hopeful submissions for the Listen To Your Mother Show has been a roller coaster.

I have compared the production of the show to pregnancy and childbirth before. It is never more similar than this year, our third year, when we are no longer first-timers or even just returning for a second go-around. With the third show, as with my third child, I knew ALL TOO WELL what I was getting into. I didn't have a fuzzy recollection of childbirth; it was CLEAR in my mind. There were no surprises with my third pregnancy-the pains, nausea, anxiety... I went into that pregnancy with my eyes wide open.

I think that this is why I feel so differently this year. I am JUST as excited and JUST as hopeful for the stories to be told. But I know, without a doubt, that for every squeal of joy over being chosen for auditions or the cast, there will be many more tears and feelings of rejection... And there's nothing I can do about that. No matter how we word it, telling someone they haven't been chosen is still a "No." It's still painful.

Maybe producers who cast shows all the time think we take it too personally. It's possible. Probable, actually. But I think it speaks of our integrity when we say that we honestly discuss each and every piece and what it means not only to the show, but also to the writer. We all just want to be heard. To be validated.

Sigh... There isn't enough coffee in the world to alleviate this pain in my head today. I am at least glad that I get to drive through the potential incoming blizzard to Wisconsin this weekend (with a working heater in my van! Woot! Woot!). Corinne has a gymnastics meet and we will be staying overnight to slide around in bathing suits. In February. In WISCONSIN. Makes perfect sense. But it will be a huge distraction for my mind. The upcoming month includes about 2.5 days of inactivity. You read that correctly. There are literally only two and a half days in February where I am not shuttling someone somewhere/working on the show/entertaining/etc. It is going to be so awesome.

Silver linings: My family is healthy. We finally have heated vehicles. I don't have to do the show alone (I love Melisa).90% of the incoming month's activities actually are enjoyable. For all of that and much more, I am grateful. And with that, I am off to teach and pack bags and find socks and be happy.