Saturday, October 02, 2010

Question for the weekend readers:

If a neighbor yells at your child, and I mean YELLS as in extremely angry, harsh tone, with an accusatory, direct order to "Come here NOW!" and you are witness to it, what do you do? Take into consideration that your child and his child were playing very roughly in the yard. Both have different versions of what happened where his child claims to have been handled too roughly (which I totally believe) but your child claims that the friend was totally involved in the wrestling match and was sitting on your child's head.

I KNOW, right? Soap opera in the backyard, eh?

I try to stay out of things as much as possible. I have stated, NUMEROUS times to all the children that if you are rough-housing, you are accepting that you may get hurt. I have also repeatedly stressed to my child that he is incredibly rough and needs to tone things down. I have also told the neighbor child that if he plays this way with my son, he has to know that things may get too physical for him, so maybe he shouldn't play rough with my son?!? I've told the parents the same. We've all agreed that my kid doesn't always know the limits so their much smaller child shouldn't be playing rough with the other boys in my yard.

And yet.

And yet, they still wrestle and play football despite the head and a half my kid has on theirs. And things still get out of control, but it is NOT entirely my son's fault!

Faults aside, though, it all comes down to the way someone else is entitled to speak to your child. I would NEVER speak the same way to their children the way he speaks to my son. Only if the said kid was in extreme danger or in the act of committing a heinous act against another child would I raise my voice at someone else's kid like that.

Keep in mind that:

a. I am not a person who will do a "hand in your face, don't you talk to MY CHILD" kind of person. I may not be mild-mannered, but I don't feel that rudeness is necessary as much as the world seems to.

b. We live within very close proximity to this family. They are our friends. We may have different parenting philosophies and lifestyles, but neither of us are perfect. We help each other out and usually get along fairly well. I want to continue this, not destroy it!

c. My son was crying today because I was reminding him about not playing rough with this child. He cried because he said the father doesn't like him, is always yelling at him, and he just wants to play with his friend.

Help!
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