Thursday, August 27, 2009

How many of my posts are written under the influence...

Maybe it's just the slightly flat, cheap champagne I'm indulging in, but my mind got to thinking tonight (it has a tendency to do that).

"Self," says my mind, "Self, what is this worry you have over 'selling out' and not wanting to write half-drunken blog posts? Thinking of Writing for Da Man? Composing fluffy little posts that mean nothing to you? Posts that make you cringe not because they were lamely written (hard to believe, but this does tend to happen on Just Another Mommy Blog) but because you were worried that a potential advertiser might come across your top post about alcohol or sex and say "HELL no! Not this one. We're moving along with our highly lucrative, multi-digit-every-month advertising figure*". Simply because your in-laws now read your blog (hi guys! All of you! Even you, dear brother-in-law!), does this mean that you should refrain from using your rare free moments to document this obvious gift of humor that oozes from your fingertips? Especially when said in-laws have said to "Go ahead! Post what you feel like!"

No sirrrrreee. I shall post with my head up and my gut out! I cannot deny the universe the experience of top notch quality posts by Tracey B.

Did you know that 10 year old champagne is somewhat like a cheap wine? True fact.

Holy crap! I almost forgot to update you all on the MOST EXCITING THING OF MY NIGHT. Brace yourselves:

I got my 100k badge on Bejeweled Blitz!

Please don't scoff (at least, not so loudly). This game is addictive, yo. I know I've written about the draw that the shiny gems and Barry White announcer have for me. So give me a little break, kay?
Wow. It's after midnight and I don't show any sign of slowing down. And I have school in the morning with the kids! I'm thinking that the option of "just read quietly this morning, kids. Mommy has a special headache..." wouldn't be the best way to start the 3rd day of school, so I will grudgingly dump the glass down the drain and trudge to bed. Crossing all my appendages that I get a good night's sleep!

*I am totally lying. If you have a highly lucrative, multi-digit-every-month advertising proposal, I will completely sell-out and write fluffy posts about how to potty-train** and what to do when your tween asks about sex.

**Though, I must admit, I am no expert on potty-training. The first two experiences were absolute nightmares that I survived only by the skin of my teeth (and the acquisition of an entire streak of gray hair***) and the last one was a fluke. She trained herself, much to my delighted shock.

***Sadly, my gray streak doesn't rock the way Stacey's does on What Not To Wear. Though we ALL know how I feel about THAT show, right Megan??

Grateful for:

~ old champagne that didn't spoil.
~ 2 days of good school in a ROW.
~ 100k, baby!!


OHmommy said...

Hahahahaha.... I just tweeted over the weekend (while slightly drunk) about how I should write a post in my fine state of mind.

sheila said...

is that true about the champagne? huh!

Unknown said...

Go For it. Let it all hang out. So to speak.

Kamis Khlopchyk said...

Oh goodness, thanks for the morning laugh. Both my boys are at school and the house is freaky quiet. But it's kind of nice and they will be home for lunch in an hour and three quarters....

Cynthia said...

Drunken posting can be dangerous girl;)

Does it scare you that I don't know what Bejeweled Blitz is?

Allison said...

The in-law thing holds me back quite often. I really want to post about the haircut my son got at grandma's the other day, but that wouldn't be nice. .....maybe a bottle of old champagne would help me along

Kristabella said...

My drunk posts are some of my best. I tend not to do it more often because I'm such a stickler for typos, that I have to go back and fix them and then the post isn't very funny then.

I'm impressed that you could keep champagne in your house for 10 years!

CaraBee said...

I have never done a drunk post. Probably because other than that one sort of tipsy night at Blogher, I haven't really drank in almost three years. YIKES! I may do that tonight, just for giggles.

Bejeweled Blitz rocks the hizzy. For realz. I play it WAY too much. You're totally kicking my bootay in the current tournament. But I'm fixing to make a comeback. You just wait.

mep said...

If you're in my hood, drop by, because I have about eight bottles of champagne (gifts mostly) and we never seem to drink it!

Do it for the love of blogging.

Debbie said...

So, is drunken posting like drunken texting?

Maybe I can convince hubs to bring the laptop to Vegas...

Issa said...

The highest I've ever gotten is 105,600 which I have right now. My friend Liz currently has a 159k though. the brat. Is a very addictive game.

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