Wednesday, September 26, 2007

Mama's loveys...

I was reading October's Parenting just a moment ago, and my dream from last night came back to me. This article, about kids' loveys and transitional objects was right on the ball for me.


My long time readers know about Evan and his Pandy bear. Pandy bear has been with us since Evan was a baby. I'm not sure why he picked this bear for his special lovey. There wasn't anything remarkable about him. Not ultra soft, or rough. Not big or small. Didn't smell like Mommy or Daddy. Really, just a panda bear. But, somehow, he became Pandy Bear. And he is a member of our family. My heart aches to think that he will someday be in the back of a closet, or under the bed. I vow to save Pandy from these indignities and preserve him, without washing, lest he lose his childhood smell. He's sticky, bare in spots, floppy and smushed at times, and is more of a light gray/dark gray panda bear now. But he is SO LOVED. Sadly, Evan no longer looks for Pandy. Oh, he still cuddles and rubs his face and plays with him, but if Pandy isn't in his bed or easily found, Evan isn't necessarily devastated. He's growing out of him... sigh...


That said, I never really gave as much thought to the fact that Justin also has a lovey of sorts. Not a stuffed animal or anything, but he has a pillow. A small, childsized pillow that I sewed with leftover curtain material and lace, back in the days that I was pregnant with him. My mom saw how much use it was getting early on, and made a pillow case out of train material for him. And a lovey was born. His Train Pillow MUST be on his bed. He feels lost without it, and I fear the day that he ruins it. The pillow itself is lumpy and misshapen (not a great seamstress, and didn't stuff it with the intention of washing it so often!). The material is faded in some spots to almost white, but he LOVES it. Loves the feel of it.



This leads me to my dream. In my dream, we were having a garage sale (which is more of a nightmare, actually). In the dream, Justin was selling his stuff and had put a price tag of $30 on his raggedy old train pillow. When the father of a little boy tried to buy it, I FREAKED on him. FREAKED! I took the pillow away from the tiny boy and said that it was NOT for sale. And then I paid $30 to the man to buy a new pillow from the store! And the boy was crying! And I didn't care. Because this was more important to me than I'd ever realized. It's his connection to babyhood. And I can't bear the thought of losing the Train Pillow, any more than losing Pandy Bear. So I will be saving a pillow and a bear until I'm old and gray.



I wonder what Corinne will attach to? She seems to vary from animal to animal, which isn't very unusual, but I can't save ALL the freakin toys. Maybe it's time to push a lovey on her.... ;)

10 comments:

Michelle said...

all the pics were so sweet! Kayla never did attach to anything like that. When she moved to the toddler bed she started making sure she had a couple of her baby dolls in bed too, and if there weren't any she would ask for "baby" but it wasn't something she always carried around or had to have, or can't sleep if it isn't there.

Ruby said...

I have way too many things from my kids that I'll get old with. Someday I hope to give(unload)them to my grown and married children for their children.

Kailani said...

I think you should keep Pandy in a safe place. One day when Evan is older he'll get a kick out of it!

Kailani
An Island Life

Beck said...

What beautiful pictures.
Not one of my kids had a lovey - not ever!

Type (little) a said...

Sabrina started with the loveys at bedtime a few months ago. And this week, she's been wanting to bring them with her (specifically sheepie- actually a lamb) and has be bawling that she can't bring her sheepie into pre school.

And "pandy bear"? TOO CUTE

Life With All Boys said...

Oh do I understand. Monte's baby blankets are in my dresser,(he slept with them EVERY NIGHT until 2nd grade) and Hunter will FREAK OUT if he can't find "favorite dog". Even if we haven't gone anywhere so we KNOW he is still in the house. I love that they have/had loveys. Carter better grab on to something too or I might just save it all!!!

painted maypole said...

corrine will pick her own lovey.

my lovey growing up was a blankets that my great aunt and crocheted, and when MQ was born my mom gave us a sweater and hat set that the same great aunt had sown, and my mother was keeping to give to a granddaughter. It was the same type of yarn and the same stitch (is that the right word for crotching?) as my blanket, and there was nothing better than holding my baby girl and putting my cheek against her head in that hat.

Tracey said...

P.M. You crack me up. crochETing. Although crotching would be interesting... :)

Anonymous said...

SlowMo has Teddy...and TheBeast has a horribly ugly blanket. I'm not sure how either of them started out with these. Had I known, theBeast would be carrying around a much prettier blanket!!!! I'm trying to attach Popeye to this quilt I got at the dr's office. Not sure it'll work, but I'm trying!!

karoline said...

i think your dream represents your anxiety at your children growing up and leaving the baby stages...so totally understandable..

can't even remember whether or not my boys had 'luveys' (great term)...although middlest used to sleep with his hockeystick..

;)
k

Related Posts with Thumbnails