Wednesday, September 29, 2010

Because I seriously need to mop...

I am overflowing with things to write about and am seriously under budget on time. SERIOUSLY.

Also? My feet keep sticking to the floor.

And? Justin wore pajama sweats to Corinne's ballet class this morning because I didn't have any clean jeans for him.

Needless to say, I have some slightly pressing matters to take care of today. Let it be said that there WILL be some new and interesting material on my site, eventually!

In the meantime, let's see if I can't find an old post to rivet your attention...

Originally posted on: Friday, February 12, 2010

Can't get no satisfaction?

Recently, a fairly well-known mommy blogger wrote a heartfelt post about the conflict she felt when encountering at-home parents on her lunch breaks from work. She honestly confessed that she feels torn between wanting so desperately to be with her little ones and yet wanting so desperately to enjoy her fabulous, upscale career. The women who jumped up and raised their fists in unison no doubt feel exactly as she does. And I feel for them, I really do. And because that was THEIR space and THEIR rallying war-cry, I didn't feel it was appropriate to write my comment on her post.

Because...

I just want to say, it's ok to say that you like being a stay-at-home mom. It's ok to not jump on the bandwagon and nod your head and say "Hear! Hear, mah sistah!" when another mom talks about how haaaard it is to be at home and how much she misses her "sense of self" that she felt when she was "working." It's OKAY to not agree to being soooo looooonely or soooo unfulfilled or soooo dissatisfied with where your life is at! It's ok to say "You know what? I actually like being home. I actually do feel acknowledged and appreciated (most of the time). Despite the hardships that my job of being a SAHM (who homeschools!) creates, I completely understand that the hardships of being a mom with a job outside of the home are not the lifestyle I wish to live."

Guess what else?

It's ok to say the exact opposite. It's ok to not have to JUSTIFY why you work. It's ok to say that you adore your job and don't fret over your kids when you're at work. It's ok to feel secure about the care they receive from your spouse, relative or other daycare provider. It's ok to acknowledge that you LOVE being a working-out-of-the-home mom.

It's ok to be satisfied with what you have.

I've done the "working mom" thing. Honestly? For me? It sucked. Every damn minute I was working sucked. I loathe the idea of ever having to re-enter the workplace while my kids are still within our home. But I can also understand how you could hate being a SAHM. I get it. However, for me? I am NOT JEALOUS. I might envy your material possessions a bit, but I don't take for granted what I have as an at-home mother. Not one single minute.

5 comments:

Lisa said...

I have say I'm jealous of sahm and working moms that love what they do because I like you LOATHE every day I have to go to work. Ok,not EVERY day, some Mondays after a particullarly rough weekend with misbehavior I don't loathe it as much. But for the most part I'd give my right arm to be able to stay at home. But you're right, one situation simply isn't perfect for everyone and I wish people would stop bashing each other like it is. I think moms who feel the need to work just to get away or for "adult" interaction just need a little redirection because as a stay at home mom i had a TON more time to be with friends. being home all day with them allowed me to not be riveted with guilt when I did go out alone on an occasional night and allowed me to get together with friends (obviously ones who weren't working) during the day and do fun stuff out and about without the crazy weekend crowds. But I would never take anything away from a mom who truly loves their job. A happy momma makes for a happier kids (typically). But sometimes we just have to do what we have to do for our family. My husband has been unemployed for several years now so I as much as I'd like to I simply can't be home.

ps good luck with those sticky floors. and can you squeeze in a couple pars of jeans for my kids too lol

Tracey - Just Another Mommy Blog said...

Lisa,

I hear ya. If Patrick were to lose his job (again) and not be able to find work? We'd be pretty damn screwed as I no longer have any type of resume to present to anyone. That is a big downside of being a SAHM. HUGE. I just want people to stop feeling like they have to either bash other people's lives or bash their own so as to fit in with what the current Mommy trend is. We ALL have different lives, you know?

Tracey

melismama said...

HI Tracey...your blog is always so awesome! I am in fact honoring your blog today by passing on the Versatile blogger award to you. Come check out the details! Be blessed

http://just-starting-out.blogspot.com/2010/09/my-first-blogger-award.html

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nmaha said...

This is beautifully written. The first time a mother is comfortable with what she is. I am a working mother, who tried being a SAHM for 6 months. It's not me and my lack of satisfaction was not a positive for my baby.
Thank you for saying it's 'ok'. I think more women should just accept and forget about what the rest of the world thinks.
We know what makes us the best kind of mom possible.
I think this is inspiration for a post that's been brewing for a long time.

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