Thursday, August 23, 2007

And then there was one...

Evan, a few minutes old.. 04/01/02
I am sitting here with just Corinne. No boys in the house. For YEARS, I have felt outnumbered by males, and now? Now it's only women in the house.

Evan marched off to kindergarten today, and I held in the sobs till I reached my house, where I broke down. Yes. I sobbed. The first day of kindergarten is a jumbled up mess of feelings for Moms. The thrill for your child, that they get to experience the fun of school, the joy of learning, the independence to thrive without you. And yet... the fear of losing them, the worries over their guaranteed pain of growing up. I don't know what his future holds, but I know that he is my baby. My amazing little boy. My fearless, outgoing, loving child. I miss him...

Evan- 3 months, Justin- 3 years, 07/04/02

Watching Justin go to 3rd grade wasn't as hard as I thought. I mean, it's only 1 year older than 2nd, right? And I have a good feeling for him, this year. I just do. Crossing every body part that he thrives and doesn't struggle too much in controlling himself. Praying that he has matured neurologically enough to maintain his composure. That he doesn't get too bored when there is review and end up looking for something else to occupy himself with... He hugged and kissed me with a smile. How many more years of that? He has become MORE physically loving this summer than he was last year. Praying that this continues...


Christmas 2002

Evan had his first soccer practice yesterday. At least it wasn't as humid and drenched as it has been, but the ground is sooooo saturated that their feet just kick up water with every step. He LOVED it. He wasn't so sure he wanted to play, when I told him I had signed him up. In fact, he was adamant that he was NOT going to play. And yet, when the other boys started chasing the ball, he was all smiles and running alongside them, laughing and shouting like he had known these kids all his life.



So, Corinne and I. Together, alone, for 3 hours every morning. Then to pick up Evan, then her nap, then to pick up Justin. This will be our routine for the next 9 months. It should work out. It WILL work out. I'm not crying anymore, but I think I was entitled. After all, you only ever get one first day of kindergarten in your life. That's it. Thus begins Evan's school career.... may it be fun and filled with friends and accomplishments. And may his disappointments only push him to try harder next time....

07/04/03

11 comments:

Melissa said...

You're such a good mom. Your wishes for your kids are so sweet. Here's hoping for a good year! :)

mcewen said...

It's always a tough start. 9 months will be over before you know it! Especially if it goes as quickly as this summer has.
Best wishes

Beck said...

That's a lovely post - I miss my kids when they head off to school, too! IT's going to be just me and The Baby all day around here - so weird!

Tonya said...

That was the sweetest post. That is what being a mom is truly about. Cherish those days and moments!

Type (little) a said...

Way to go buddy!

And hugs to mommy. I'm pretending that my baby's day isn't only 2 short years from now.

This entry would make an awesome scrapbook page for him. Especially because middle children (whether they actually are or not) often feel lost in the shuffle.

Anonymous said...

Those are great pictures!!! It's nice that I'm homeschooling so SlowMo gets to be with me all day long. I'm really enjoying it. I hope Evan loves school!!!!

Michelle said...

how bittersweet! It must feel so weird in the house with just you two!

painted maypole said...

i know that kindergarten pain. LOVED the Xmas pictures!!!

Miss Hope said...

A friend had to physically take me by the arm out of the classroom with my oldest. I was just sure she'd never make it through day one without me by her side. She's in 8th grade now. Now I get to go through all that again next year when I drop her off at high school. Does it ever end??????

Jamie said...

I can't even imagine. Can't.
Good job staying strong until you got back into the house :)

TruLove said...

My mom told me (as I sobbed into the phone) on my daughter's first day of Kindergarten (9 years ago) that the reason that K is so hard is it is the first time you start to let go and say good bye. It was so true. I cried a river when she started Junior high. I was a wreck two weeks ago when she started high school. It is so hard. It breaks your heart...in a good way.

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