Tuesday, August 06, 2013

It's your own fault if you read this

I love that being a blogger gives me license to talk to myself.

"Shhh... I'm 'writing' in my head." = The voices are really interesting today and I would like to continue my conversation with them.

In fact, I have conversations WITHIN the conversations in my head. I hold detailed forums with myself about the ways in which I could write about some Really Fascinating Thought. Unfortunately, these forums happen most frequently while I am indisposed; generally in the bathtub or at the kitchen sink. The Former because I am literally submerged and couldn't hear my family if they were knocking on the door with a sledgehammer and the Latter because nobody wants to help so I am avoided like the plague while I stand on my mat in front of our 'stainless' steel sink. All of that peaceful silence allows me to really let the conversation go batshit crazy and I end up arguing with myself.

"Why are you angry, Mommy?"

How do you answer that when the reason is because you were yelling at yourself IN YOUR MIND?

Better to blame it on the laundry never getting put away. Laundry can't defend itself; it also can't put itself away. WHY HAVEN'T WE INVENTED THAT YET??!?

Get on it, techy-people. I don't need another tablet-ish screen thing. I need laundry that takes care of itself.

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