Friday, December 17, 2010

Ba-dum. Ba-dum.

I love to fill the bathtub up with steaming hot water and just lie back until only my nose is above the water. First, I listen to the pounding water. Its volume fills my ears and is so impressively LOUD. But a fabulous noise. Such a lovely, repetitive, non-demanding sound. When the level threatens to overflow, I deftly turn the knob with my foot because I am full of mad acrobatic skills like that. Remaining completely still, the water begins to still and the silence takes over...

Ah! The silence!

The absolute absence of auditory assault is amazing.

No stomping feet.
No requests for equal shares.

No pestering of siblings.
No requests from telemarketers.

No sound except...

Dang. There's that thumping again. That repetitive, annoying bumping! Insistently growing in volume, the bass drum positively RESOUNDS in my underwater sanctuary! It reminds me of the alien transmission from Contact...

For just a moment, I try to will the annoyance away. Can't I have one single, solitary moment of Honest Silence?

Like an idiot, I gradually comprehend that willing away the beating of one's own heart might not be the most brilliant of ideas. Since I can't (and don't want to) escape it, I instead embrace its steady cadence. I marvel at the miracle of this small mass of muscles that is responsible for every aspect of my life. Its rhythm brings peace to my soul and tears of gratitude to my eyes...

Beat on, little heart. I love to listen to your song.

6 comments:

Unknown said...

I'm glad that heart is beating so well. Keep up the good work.

E... said...

Lovely, Tracey. Just lovely.

Balancing Lisa said...

I love this! You are a great writer!

http://stilettosanddiaperbags.blogspot.com/

Stacia said...

I thought you were going to say it was the banging of little hands on the bathroom door! =>

Tonya said...

it took my a second to realize you were talking about your heart! haha

Julie said...

Reminds me of the Mash episode where Hawkeye asks the patient if he's had that throbbing in his wrist for long. I still don't get to take baths alone.

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